Ever find yourself on one side of an opinion then suddenly switching sides when you find out your friends and coworkers think differently than you do? Do your likes and dislikes change depending on who you are with? Are you afraid to voice your opinion? Are you afraid to share an idea in case you offend someone or lose a friend?
Stop. Get over it. Stand up for yourself.
No matter what you do — stand up for who you are and be honest about your feelings. Even if it seems like you will be crucified for it; even if you think you will not be as successful or as liked — in the end, it’s only your honesty that will have mattered.— Bryant McGill
Of course, there is no need to be rude or get defensive, but standing up for yourself in a productive way is healthy and most of your friends will appreciate your candor and honesty. Here are some tips on how to get over your fears and start standing up for yourself:
Teach People How to Treat You
Your coworkers, your boss, your friends, and even your family will only treat you as badly as you allow them to. According to Forbes.com, “Whatever the current state of your personal or professional relationships, consider where you sometimes stay silent rather than speaking up to make a stand for yourself… it may not seem like a big deal, but over time, we teach people how to treat us… In the end, we get what we tolerate.” Stand up for yourself and those you associate with will treat you with more respect.
Learn to Say No
Apa.org says you need to learn how to say no if you want to become more assertive. Being a good friend, co-worker, employee, or student does not mean you always say ‘yes’ it means you are conscious of others and your own abilities and you act accordingly.
Think it through
Need to start standing up for yourself? Success.com says, “When you need to assert yourself, the best plan is to have one; don’t just shoot from the hip.” Think through what you are going to say and how you are going to say it so that you are standing up for yourself without being rude or careless.
Fake it till you make it
Still scared about standing up for yourself and losing friends? You know it is important to stand up for yourself and you know that you should, so now is the time to fake it till you feel confident about it. According to huffingtonpost.com, “Faking it till you make it is all about imitating that confidence, that absolutely does not exist anywhere, until it produces some real… confidence.”